HOWEVER...even with all that said....trust has to be earned, right! I do not want to let my guard down and regret it. The other side of that is I feel a little, very little guilty about snooping, eavesdropping and reading of the notes/blogs. And I think because really I have found NOTHING. They are only 13 though, but today that doesn't mean anything either from some of the stuff they have shared with me.
I do feel blessed that we are very close and they feel comfortable telling me about stuff their friends do that they don't approve of and sharing who uses bad language, who has kissed a boy already, who sneaks on the phone late at night, but then all my suspicions raise like...they must be doing these things to and seeing how I am going to react...a little trick I did with my Mom at that age. Who knows, parenting is hard, single parenting is super hard. I pray hard every night for them, their values and for me to continue to be the best parent I can be to them, but by the time you know, as a parent you did a good/bad job, it is to late to change anything.
So alllllllllll this stemmed from this past weekend, Ty spent the night at a friends (a new friend I hadn't met yet, always leary of the new ones) and then she stayed at our house the following night. She seemed VERY sweet and very respectful, innocent and happy young lady. I met her Mom on Friday and she gave me good vibes as well. SOOOOOOOO, she has a myspace account, which I am not fond of, but whatever..... and she was on it and they girls were uploading pics I had taken of them and her Mom came to pick her up and so she didn't sign out. HERE I GO!!!! I closed my door and locked it and started reading, feeling guilty and nervous about what I might find but it's for my kids, I need to know who they are hanging out with. After reading more then I could stand....really searching for a nugget of some bad thing, I found nothing. GUILT really set in. She is as sweet as she appears and even more so. She is a good friend. She is focused on school and her studies and she values her friendships. So, I am good!!!
AM I WRONG??????? What every mother out there done the same thing??? AM I CRAZY??? As soon as they turn 14 am I going to be worse??? I sure hope not cause more then anything i don't want to push them away with my craziness.
Here are a few pics from this past weekend