Moments I want to remember...

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

A letter documenting how crazy the "Baby daddy" is

VERY DISTURBING, read with caution.....

This is the first one in response to my request for some money:
Are you that stupid or do you just get your rocks off by disregardingmy email? Just like disregarding everything else I ever say to you.Do you not understand english or do you think I have a serious condition of memory loss? I do recall sending you a reply to yourwork email which got sent back, so I got your yahoo email address from Barbie and sent the exact email to this one.So Ms. Can I/Can you...would you mind explaining why its so fuckingdifficult to acknowledge a fucking email? In addition, come back weekslater as if "fuck what I say" or "ask for", and send me an email saying..."can you give me some money for the girls". Since you want to ignoremy email about their daycare situation, I will ignore you. Like I wanna be ignorant, we will continue to beef.So how bout this smart ass, answer my fucking question or you justsimply tell me what "the girls" need b/c it sounds like to me you're diverting theissue of daycare on to simply "the girls" need things.Okay Sherlock..fine, you tell me what they need. I'm not giving you a dime inyour hand. Putting money in your hands is insane. God only knows how you'vehandled money in the past. You may think I'm that dumb and naive, but sorry...I'm not! You concentrate on staying clean & staying away from weed smoking bamas/hustlers. I'll worry about what they need.Now once again...what time do they get out of school. If you cant answer simple questionsdont send me another fucking email. I'm not playing your game anymore. Its old & childish.

This is the follow up to my response and the last words we had almost a year ago:

First of all ,, I dont give a fuck what proof you have nor what someone has told you.Second of all, dont try to put this fatherly bullshit in the picture when you "chose"to drive to some niggas house before you could "drive" to my mothers.You talk about "anger"?? I dont have anger in the sense that you're trying to interpret.Its your fucking attitude towards shit & how you contradict yourself. You can hidebehind all this petty shit but I'll be fucking damn if you think just b/c you have raised them "on your own" that I'm supposed to be some toy that you can controlwhile you dont make "effort" to do "anything" I ask. Now you tell me when has therebeen "one moment" of you doing what the fuck I ask. NOT ONE FUCKING TIME, SOLETS NOT GET MY WORDS CONFUSED!! I KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I'M TALKING ABOUTAND SO DO YOU, MS. LET MY KIDS CALL OTHER PEOPLE DADDY SIMPLY B/C OF YOUREXPECTATIONS BUILT AROUND SOME IDIOTIC THINKING PATTERN THAT ONLY BURNEDYOU IN THE LONG RUN. YOU BEST BELIEVE THAT SHIT HAPPENS TO YOU FOR A REASON.. SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD LOOK IN THE MIRROR.You know why I let shit ride? Do you? B/C I could be worse. Its b/c I knewyour days were limited. Whether it been a year, 6 mo.'s or whatever.Now ask yourself now Sherlock, and take me out of the equation....why doesshit happen to you the way it does?? Hmm...go figure. It damn sure aint Rog.And I dont have to bring up old shit. I dont even know what the fuck you do, but I definitely can make sense out it. Its called LOGIC!! You think its cool to carry yourself the way you do, yet still make demands basedon the kids sake, but in the same token you've been livin your life doing any/everythingyou want to do, when you feel like it. So what then? Do you not use excuses?It sounds like to me that you're identifying your own shit and putting on me.I take full responsibility for my shit and will tell you right now, your attitude isa peice of shit. You wanna call me out FUCK YOU!! You wanna run your mouth about me in the past as if your some fucking angel? FUCK YOU!! You wanna confusethe girls and hide behind what....that i'm not around when your 1/2 the blame if notmore? You dont think you play a role in how fucked up shit is? Do you not think, that the times I have had them that they dont question "mommy's actions", themen, the moving,etc?? Get off your self pity bullshit as if I'm trying to divert anduse old shit. This is brought up b/c it never has been to its entirety and you know it.You call yourself genuine. I stay the fuck back b/c I'm confident enuff in whatI feel that every bitch has their day. You've had yours and yet you still wannainterpret shit as if i'm not speaking the truth, so you respond w/ this type ofnonsense. You've got issues. And yes, you damn right I asked you to do "certain" things b/c if it would help and is safe so be it. And I'm glad you didnt b/c who knows what other problems you might have had. If shit was so crisp on yourend you would've never gone through the shit that you did. Do youget that? Frontin like Ms. Supermom/ Roger's a dead beat dad.Like I told you, I'm not your fucking toy. So you can use whatever u feel u need toto make yourself feel better. I havent and I wont put up w/ your bullshit, ignorewhat i have to say, disappear for months at a time, and then ask me for shitb/c you have a legit reason which is.."i'm the father".. Yes...I am the father, butI'm not your fucking toy. So when you make comments like.."asking me for $$2 x's a year.. Who's fault is that? You do what u do, then come to me later.Thats your pattern and thats what I'm speaking on. Come out when u need somethingand ignore other shit whenever you get good and ready...and at the same timebe doing stupid shit around the kids. Are you fucking nuts or something.Your way or no way. This is why you struggle. You wanna call me names,so be it. Let them call somebody else daddy? So be it. These are your choices, notmine. So dont try to divert the shit b/c it wont work. You ignore me, you'll getignored. I think I've been pretty consistent w/ mine and in response you keepdoing the same shit. You're bliind and ignorant all in the same. And to runyour mouth about me for whatever reason back in the day when i FIRST gothome....are you fucking kidding me? You've got alot of nerve. So I sat andwatched. In more ways than you know. So what you think you know about meI dont give a damn. You've got proof? Proof or no proof..what's your point?Like I said in another email "that was ignored" as I speak on continuously/consistentlythroughout this email, you wouldnt know what the fuck is going on in my life. Butyou open your ears up enough to hear what you wanted to hear to keep living, thinking,and doing whatever you want..Okay ..fine, but then its right back to roger being your toyand ask for shit out of nowhere. Is this not your pattern? Correct me if I'm wrong.Consistent since I've been home. So lets not talk about the past 4yrs b/c you're wrong.I can answer questions that the twins ask me if you like. I have no problem with that sinceyou wanna talk shit. Be a father huh? Be this , be that huh? Ok Harmony. I'll be you this time. So while your answers may have been biased based on your shit tothe twins, mine will be straight up. I'll make sure of that since these are the rules youlive by. One thing for sure, your life isnt the way it is b/c of Roger, thats for sure.And since you have been the mother/father hhmmm.. go figure as to why the girlsask so many questions about mommy when there shouldnt be anything to ask.Not one thing!!! You're the perfect one. You've disrespected me and your own daughters.Whatever you may think I do or dont, its definitely no where near your addictive shit,nor has it been around them or titi, your men problems, nor do they need to question me. That I know.And the one question they may ask, you have a significant role as to why it is what it is.Everytime I spit some real shit, you either disappear or come w/ the most common reactionthats so predictable. I'm taking full responsibility and have made it clear a long time ago in one way or another that i'm not your toy. I've made it clear in many ways from tellingyou to come to mom's, keep threatening me I'll .." " ', you only call when.." " ", yet you stil do the same shit. As if to say..fine so be it..Ok ..fine so be it. If nothing changes, nothing changes so keep hiding behind words like responsibility, be a're a joke. All b/c of your ignorant ass, addictive personality, wanting to be in control,using the kids as leverage when you want to, and conditional expectations. So it wontmatter what I say or do...Do you get that?? I doubt it!!Maybe you just dont get it? Or maybe you dont want to? Or maybe b/c you never had a fatherit makes it easier to create this addition to all the shit I've been talking about in thisemail. Sure does make sense to me. So dont talk about "caring". You abuse words whileyou sit and contradict yourself in your own "fashion".And once again, you need to divert or make an excuse as to why you dont respond. Wake the fuke up b/c you did "disregard" my email just like many other times.Lets make this very simple, just b/c you gave a reason as to why you didnt respond doesntjustify nor take away the principle. YOU DID DISREGARD IT BY NOT RESPONDING!! IS YOUR INTELLIGENCE LEVEL AT ZERO? Saying that you moved, stating where you moved,giving details,etc is a proper reply which would definitely "look like" you acknowledged it.So please stop insulting my intelligence. God damn you make me fucking sick w/ yourthinking pattern. Your words.."therefore I figured" your answer of getting them everydaywasnt going to work.. Then guess what genious..." you say exactly that" but you on the other handreply w/ "i need $$, or this or that"..You just dont get it and its fucking ridiculous and this has been you since who knows when.I know me & have never denied shit. Once again, I'm not putting up w/ your bullshit, soyou are the blame. I'm not your fucking toy, so if all that matters is that you get your $$, which is sure does look like it & you sure do imply it, so be it. God will kick u in the ass, b/c I know how I feel and if I have to wait..fine. I"ve been very patient watching yourattitude be your worse enemy. Call me dead beat dad, say i dont care, say "if i really care",all the shit that presses the wrong buttons with me. Your day will come 10 x's worse thanany law, government, prison or whatever can do to me.Something tells me you like it like this. So write the list and I'll take it from there.This discussion is over.


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