Welcome to Womanhood

Well, just when I think I have no excitement in to my life, God shows me. Last night was an experience I was not prepared for and don’t think I could have possibly prepared myself for no matter what I did. Men, you may not want to read this, it’s a welcome to womanhood.


I am getting my daughters’ ready for bed and Tricia tell me she has a cut on her pee-pee, so, (not sympathetic) I tell her to put some cream on it and get to bed. It’s about 10:20 now. I go in the room to hug and kiss them good night and Tricia is crying, so now I am a little freaked out. I ask her what’s wrong, what’s the problem and finally she says, there’s blood, a lot of it and I am scared. So, I tell her to get out of bed and show me the cut, I take her in to my room and she shows me her panties, sure enough there’s a red stripe. I lay her down and say, “Show me where it hurts.” Now, women, we all know if we have a cut down there, it hurts, it doesn’t matter how little it is, it hurts, so you can imagine my surprise when she says, “It doesn’t hurt.”, now I am not in anyway, shape, or form thinking it’s her period, and than BOOM, it hits me like a ton of bricks and I feel like I am going to throw up.

Me: It doesn’t hurt?
Tricia: Nope, but it’s bleeding and I am scared
Me: Go in the bathroom and wipe yourself and tell me if there is blood
Her: Yes, it’s still bleeding
Me: (totally freaking out at this point and trying to remain cool, “big smile on face”, is what I keep repeating to myself) Baby, you got your period, how exciting (grab her and give her a big hug, smash her in to my chest so she can not see my true expression, cause the kid can read me like a book) Welcome, you are now a young lady, this is wonderful.
Her: What, what does this mean?
Me: You are a young lady now, this is very exciting (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH)
Her: Now what, do I have to get a stick
Me: No, why don’t you call grandma and I will run to the store and get you some pads and show you how to use them

So, I am so out of my mind right now, I drive all the way to the store on the phone with Aimee/ Barbie freaking out and get there and realized all I grabbed was my phone, smokes and a lighter, NO MONEY. So, I drive back, get money and go back to the store and search through the isle with Barbie on the phone trying to pick out a good one for her so she is comfortable. Then, the poor kid, I get home and she is sleeping already and I am trying to wake her up. “Mom, please in the morning, I am so tired, show me in the morning.”, of course I made her get up and showed her and then snuggled her back in to bed and drank my 22 of beer I grabbed while I was at the store.

The ironic part of this whole event is I took the to the doctors last week and we had a whole discussion about it, at the doctors and than on the way home, so she wasn’t freaked out at all. Her sister on the other hand was very and all she wanted to know is, “When is mine coming!!!!” Poor thing, I am so glad it was Tricia first, cause it would have been an entirely different night.